Become Undone
by violetstars1039
Summary: What if Dean had taken the Crossroad Demons deal and brought John back instead of saving Evan Hudson?


Become undone Become undone January 17, 2007

I sat on the hood of the Impala watching the cars pass by on the darkened road. I knew I needed to get back to the Hudson's house to get Sammy but I just couldn't seem to move myself from this spot. Sam knows that I didn't waste the Crossroads demon obviously; by the way he was blowing up my phone. How do I tell him what I've done? I sacrificed Evan Hudson so we could have Dad back. I can picture Sammy's face now when I tell him. Sam's going to tell me all the things I already know; that I'm selfish and what I did was wrong. Okay, well, maybe I was being selfish but I have my reasons. Why do we always have to sacrifice ourselves for strangers? It's not fair and I just couldn't live another day knowing Dad traded his life for mine.

Two Hours Earlier

"_You're lucky I've got a soft spot for lost puppies and long faces. I just can't leave you like this." The Demon murmured as she slinked her way towards me, "Besides, you didn't call me here to bargain for Evan. Not really."_

"_You'll bring him back?" I paused looking her directly in the eye, "My dad?"_

"_Of course I can –- just as he was. Your dad will live a long, natural life…. like he was meant to. That's a promise." _

"_What about me?"_

"_I can give you ten years –- ten long, good years with him. That's a lifetime. Your family can be together again. John, Dean, Sammy. The Winchester boys all reunited." She purred running her fingers slowly up my chest, "Look, your dad's supposed to be alive. You're supposed to be dead. So, we'll just set things straight. Get things back in their natural order. And you get ten extra years on top. That's a bonus." _

"_Okay….." I whispered._

_She grabbed my face suddenly pressing her lips to mine shoving her tongue into every corner and crevice of my mouth. I pulled back confused and disgusted all at the same time, "What the hell was that for?"_

"_Sealing the deal."_

"_I usually like to be warned before I'm violated with demon tongue."_

"_You'll have your father back just like he was before he traded his soul and you Dean will get ten long years with him and Sammy."_

"_How do I know you're not lying?"_

"_My word is my bond."_

"_Oh, really?" I asked raising my eyebrow at her doubtfully._

"_It is when I make a deal. It's the rules."_

My mouth dropped open when I saw the familiar shape making its way towards me. I couldn't believe it, it was really him. I didn't really think the demon would keep her word but there he was standing in front of me; flesh and bone. It was like pet semetery except I didn't have to dig any grave and he wasn't all zombie like.

"Dad?"

"What have you done, Dean?"

"I made a deal……."

"You of all people should know what's dead should STAY dead."

"Oh yeah? What about me, Dad? I should be dead! You sold your soul for me! I'm just setting things right!"

"You should've left it alone, boy!"

"Kettle black, Dad ……"

"Don't you get smart with me!"

"Whatever, you're back now. And we can finish this together. We need you Dad."

"Dean……"

"DON'T! You trade your life for mine and then you tell me I might have to kill Sammy! What the fuck?! How could you lay that all on me, uh? You knew all that time what Sam's supposed to be and you don't tell us? You don't tell me? But, you tell me I might have to waste my little brother? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"What's done is done Dean. How long did the bitch give you?"

"Ten years."

"DEAN!"

"What Dad? I'm living on borrowed time here anyway. You know it and I know it. You got your life back and I got a ten year bonus. It's a win win."

May 6, 2007

I still remember the look on Sammy's face when he saw me standing in front of the Hudson's house with Dad. He was shocked at first, then he turned to me anger lighting up his face. He knew exactly what I had done without me having to say a word. He didn't yell at me, there was no screaming match. Instead, Sam told me what I had done was wrong and that it was our job to save people no matter what. Deep down I knew he was right.

Now he's gone. I had one job my entire life and that was to protect my little brother. I failed and I can't save him. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. If I didn't make that pact with the crossroads demon I could've brought Sam back. There was nothing I could do now but bury him. My father keeps telling me that it was meant to be but I don't buy it. He said I was supposed to be dead and if he hadn't traded his life for mine that I wouldn't have been able to save Sam anyway. He told me it was just Sam's time to go. Well, I didn't buy that bullshit for a second.

I waited until he was asleep and crept out of the motel room. I knew the Yellow eyed demon and that kid Jake were in Wyoming. That's where I was headed to end this once and for all. First, the yellow-eyed bastard killed my mom, then my dad and now he took Sammy from me too. I was gonna make him pay. I didn't have the colt yet but my guess would be on Jake.

I went back to the motel I had left my father at to find him still there. He was sitting at the small kitchen table pouring over charts and graphs in an attempt to track down yellow eyes. I threw the colt on the table as I glared at my father. He looked up at me, confusion clouding his eyes, "Where did you get this, Dean?"

"From the kid that killed Sam. I ended your war. Jake and Yellow eyes are dead."

That's the last thing I ever said to my father. I simply turned around and walked out of the motel room. I got in the Impala looking over at the passenger side where Sam should've been sitting. Turning the key in the ignition I nodded to myself as AC/DC blasted from the speakers and I could hear Sam clearly in my head telling me I needed to update my tape collection. I smirked talking to no one but myself, "House rules, Sammy. Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cake hole."


End file.
